Train your Partner like a Puppy
Husbands and boyfriends are like little children. They throw their socks under the bed, put empty jars back in the fridge and you have to remind them to wash their hands before dinner. But that’s the way it is and always will be. Yet, writer Amy Sutherland wanted to model her partner like a piece of play-doh in the Perfect Husband. She explains you all about it in her book ‘What Shamu taught me’. Here are the most remarkable training tips.
First of all, she states that you should train your husband in the same way you train a young puppy. So stop nagging. Instead of telling him 6 times a week that he is a pig and doesn’t do nothing all day long (which she puts on the same line as ‘punishing’ a puppy), you should reward him. If he takes out the trash or makes the bed in the morning, praise him and compliment him, as if he were Mozes and just split the sea. For the record, i thanked my boyfriend and gave him an attaboy this morning when he put his cup in the dishwasher and he looked at me as if i were nuts.
Also, you should teach him with small steps. Say you want him to do the laundry. You explain everything calmy, and when after his first laundry you discover he ruined your favourite black bra (Calvin Klein, with lace) because he put it together with the towels at 60 degrees… you have to praise him that he even managed to put the soap in the right tray. “Look for small bits of progress instead of expecting something brand new all of a sudden” says Sutherland. I did it my way and went completely crazy. Which didn’t help much either.
Ok, so maybe it worked for her, but for me this is clearly not the right way. And you know what? I’m happy with the man i have, and even though the things he does can irritate me sometimes, i wouldn’t want to change him. In the same way i would not appreciate it if he wanted to change me (“Honey? If you don’t buy any new shoes this week, i’ll give you a biscuit!”).
Now rests only one question. Where did the writer get all this wisdom? The Shamu in the title of the book refers to an orca from Sea World, San Diego. Shamu was the second female orca ever captured, at the age of 4. She lived only 6 more years, while orca’s in the wild generally become 50 years old, some even 80.
Sutherland watched and observed with animal trainers, and learned their techniques to subdue the animals. Personally, that didn’t impress me. There is a reason why they call the animal killer whale. A beast that weighs more then 12000 pounds belongs in the wild, not in a tank throwing a ball to a trainer. So she expects me to break my boyfriend’s spirit, to control him and make him do whatever I want, just like a killer whale in captivity? Thanks but no.
Nothing blows away little irritations like a holiday. And if you want to see some fishes, how about a visit to the Oceanarium of Lisbon? Lots of tropical fishes, but no killer whales! And for a perfect stay, rent the best apartments in Lisbon.
